immobilized

WED 14th 11:11pm
yesterday morning, i sat squished in the front seat of a taxi with another girl from SIT on our way to school. they are five girls in my neighborhood, and to save on the extra 3 USD it takes to get to school, we cram into one taxi every morning that only has four seats. Because of my size, i'm blessed with the adventure every morning of finding new ways to squeeze my frame into the space left over once everyone else has taken their seats. The ride passed as normal, the traffic slightly heavy with people trudging to and from work i suppose, our driver was a bit more enthusiastic this morning, telling us of his two wives (one in Palestine, one in Amman), and speaking of the situation in Palestine. Not interested in continuing the conversation, i tuned into the radio broadcast that he kept switching around... first some arab pop music, then some bbc news, and then to a local station having a call in session on the topic of public transportation in Amman. Now this is what i was interested in. Why the hell am i crammed uncomfortably in a cab spending nearly 6 times as much as i spent in one morning to take a Micro bus to school in the morning in Damascus, and what does that say for the rest of the people in the city trying to get around. At least in Damascus, the city is small enough that you can get about anything you need within a good walking distance (i also enjoy long strolls, so this is clearly relative). Here, the many hills/mountains with Amman is stretched out upon divide up the sprawling city, and i haven't even thought twice about walking somewhere (although i'm probably in need of the exercise). needless to say, let's get back to caller number one from the show. It was a lady living in East Amman, and she complained about how much it costs everyday to send her 6 kids to school. She pointed out that if you don't have a car, public transportation seems to be just as expensive and possibly more so, seeing that the bus system isn't well enough established, leaving you only with a cab drive, which just from one section of town to the next costs a USD (let alone from one end of the city to the next). As i was listening i kept reminiscing about the micro rides i miss so much from Damascus, and thought of asking our cabby what he thought about the subject, but decided against it. I wasn't in the mood with dealing with him and his grin.
The subject came up again to my mind today during our thought provoking lecture by a local 'think tanker' at the University of Jordan. Although i forget exactly what topic we were on at the time, something dealing with local uprising in the community of Amman, revolutionary thoughts of the people and such, a student made a comment: "Where are these 'slums' we talk about." Exactly. We haven't seen them yet. We've been here for almost 2 weeks now, and i've barely looked upon a shabby part of down, except from a distance, and even then, i would not have labeled them slums. Is it because we have no interest in going, or is it because we've felt immobilized by the public transportation system. Everyday i have to strategically plan out my trips around town because I'm so money conscious, especially with the steep comparison of city transportation here than to Damascus. I spend just on my trip to school in the morning, what i would probably have spent in a week last semester. So am i the only one immobilized, perhaps not only am i too money conscious to go the these "slums" but also people in those slums general mobilization to get out of them themselves. in terms of revolutionary consciousness, perhaps a factor of simple section to section immobility that has an effect on the spread of these thoughts... or perhaps does it inflame thoughts of revolt? The woman on the radio show was clearly unhappy, but what was her response to this unhappiness besides calling into a radio show? Do people take advantage of the radio waves as their public transportation, do they use the internet? Is there a connection between physical immobility and immobility of the mind?
Of course these thoughts are in direct relation to our speaker today, who led us to believe that there is no public uprising in Jordan at the moment because of the level of economic stability alloted from American aid. I will never know if in fact this 'immobility' that i speak about exists in these 'slums' that i still haven't seen. But i speak from my own experience as an American within this city, who while having the means to move around, struggles none the less (obviously there are many factors that have to do with this: time, the distance of the house from the city center, finding people to join me, etc.). It's just a thought.

-let me not forget to mention the immobility of the maid in our house, whose story i just discovered recently. but that's a different story.

I also have many thoughts responding to the actual points our speaker brought up today, but I'm definitely in need to sort them out before attempting to address them clearly. until then, here are some topics i'll most likely be dealing with:
- defining modernity as where "reason dominates" among many other things
- speaking of the values that Arabs need to inherit to truly modernize their system both politically and economically--> referring to starting this in schools with basic values of : not lying, being success driven, motivated to solve problems for themselves. This all in relation to a comment made later on the necessity of killing a certain person in politics saying "he needs to be shot, and you can quote me"... perhaps also addressing how we solve problems for ourselves should be addressed.... Also relating these values as a set of cultural instincts that need to be changed within the family structure, and specifically gender relations (perceptions of women from men and women upon themselves). I couldn't help but cringe a bit at this discussion, hopefully i'll figure out why soon.
- related to this, the "facade of modernity" in the Middle East.